If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize