so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Too much gin, very little bucket
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
