he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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