there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
