Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Farmville is her only friend.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
