Christians are straight up FREAKS
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
