So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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