oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
