hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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