he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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