her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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