Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

my phone cant type all the emotion im having

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future

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(904): View more from Florida

The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering

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(404): View more from Georgia

Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...

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