need another drink. this is the easiest way
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
