I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize