Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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