i just wanna soil my oats bro
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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