Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
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