More tranny stories later!
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize