I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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