So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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