Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
