dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
it hurts more in the daytime
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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