My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
