His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
false alarm. still invincible.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
