Say something about gay babies.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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