sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
My friends, they love my intelligence
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize