i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
We need a shit load of segways right now
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
