YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
