I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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