I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Bring me that man meat
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
