Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize