just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Damn victory sex feels great
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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