Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
