fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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