piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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