I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
