I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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