Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
