So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
