oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
