By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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