would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
