i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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