it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
