Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
ugly people sure do ruin things
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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