FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
