i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
farters have to be the big spoon...
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
