is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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