Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
