He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
