i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
