Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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